I’m not a ‘real’ blogger.. but hey that’s ok!

GILET - CARI'S CLOSET

Okay so weird title I know, but it’s the best way to actually describe how I’m feeling in this post. A quick search on google tells you that a blogger is “a person who regularly writes material for a blog.”, and I guess, yeah, I do do that (let’s use the term regularly very loosely here), but still sometimes I just don’t feel like I’m a blogger.

I don’t have a million adoring fans who sit refreshing my insta feed waiting for my next post, I don’t get all expenses paid trips to the Bahamas where I can post pictures of my croissants and orange juice in bed in the morning and I haven’t got my own In The Style collection (where you can get 20% off with my code!). Brand collaborations, no matter how small, still excite the HECK out of me, and I nearly fell off my chair when I got a couple of LFW invites last month… trust me, I am still just as pumped when I get an email from someone that wants to work with me as I was when I first started out.

Just to clarify, there is nothing wrong with all the above, and I’m certainly not mocking those fabulous opportunities and those talented people who get them, all I’m saying is that in my head there’s a very clear ‘blogger formula’ and it’s one that I certainly don’t fit. Sometimes I get a little bummed about my content and my completely normal lifestyle and end up feeling that if there’s barely any inspirational content no one will really be drawn to my stuff. I almost started to feel like if you weren’t jetting off to the Maldives followed by New York and then Paris fashion week then your content wasn’t worthwhile, I mean why would people show an interest in you when there’s so much more insane stuff out there to look at and read. But then I realised that every day life could be colourful too. And actually, finding the interest, beauty, colour and fun in the mundane parts of life is actually something really cool in itself.

PHOTOGRAPHY - LESLEY S.

SO what I work 9-5 and I drive around in a little Peugeot 206 trying to make my gym class after work while still having time to pop into Aldi to get some fresh fruit for my morning smoothies that look more like sludge than any smoothie bowls you’ll see on insta. My “office” is my bed - where you’ll find me desperately trying to edit out my shaky hand footage from my latest ‘vlog’, repeatedly resisting the urge to throw my old-ass non-MacBook laptop out the window. I have to turn down wonderful blog opportunities because I simply can’t get the time off work and sometimes I don’t blog for weeks at a time because I’m just too tired with balancing my job and every day boring life stuff like.. I dunno… Socialising? Taking care of myself? Showering? Just being? I don’t know, life can just be tiring sometimes!

I don’t live in Brighton or London, in fact I still live at home (thanks mum and dad) and pay board there because to be honest I’m not sure where I want to live, whether I want to rent, buy a house or even travel the world one day.

I don’t know exactly where I’m going with this, I suppose that sometimes I just don’t feel ‘successful’ enough to call myself a blogger, or even think myself a blogger. I’m not some big shot I’m just a really really normal person living a really normal life…. But I’m starting to actually kinda like that. I’m starting to realise you don’t HAVE to be anything but yourself to be a blogger, and that actually if you’re making content that is authentic, real and true to yourself then that’s what’s going to be most interesting and that’s the best you can do. YES it’s the dream to be that girl that has brands flocking at her feet and who’s diary is stacked out with back to back meetings, but to be honest I really like my life and I really like job, my friends, my home, and I actually really like sharing my reality with you guys instead of trying to create a picture of something that isn’t completely true.

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